You know you are a choir nerd if …

 

  1. You are sure that all of your missing textbooks can be found in the choir room
  2. You haven’t had lunch in the cafeteria since your director’s last faculty meeting
  3. You have gone through your “Whitacre is AWESOME” phase, and now just wish he would write something different.
  4. Your section leader’s phone number is on your speed dial.
  5. You think band geeks “just don’t get it”
  6. You get chills just thinking about eight-part double choir music
  7. You try to align your car blinkers tempo to the Mozart piece that is currently playing on the radio
  8. You think the alto who stands near you is hot, but you know she won’t go out with you because you are a tenor.
  9. You think the tenor who stands next to you is cute, but you know he won’t date you because 1) you are an alto, and/or 2) you are a senior and he is a sophomore and/or 3) his girlfriend is standing across the choir
  10. Your daily workout involves moving the risers
  11. You have intentionally fallen off the risers
  12. You have developed an enormous bladder capacity, due to massive amounts of water consumption, and the fact that your director never lets you go during rehearsal
  13. You have been fired from your job because you wouldn’t miss the concert
  14. You work three jobs in the summer to afford to go on tour
  15. You wish the freshmen boys would just stop touching you and leave you alone
  16. All your prom dates have been choir members
  17. You find that tour wasn’t long enough, so you go to IHOP with your section after you get back
  18. Your ideal school renovation is a drinking fountain in the choir room
  19. The only day you do your hair (or shave) is the day of the concert
  20. The majority of your wardrobe consists of choir t-shirts and apparel
  21. You get separation anxiety every time you turn in music
  22. You look forward to trashing the Hal Leonard Catalog every year
  23. Golden Corral has a special place in your heart
  24. It makes your day when your director notices your new hair cut
  25. You are not looking forward to graduation because you know what music is being programmed next fall
  26. You dream in four part harmony
  27. You get mad when your friends don’t talk in four bar phrases
  28. You can’t be in the church choir because you have too critical of an ear
  29. You know ALL the names of your director’s dogs
  30. You’ve re-organized the choral library this semester … twice
  31. You get nervous when instrumental students enter the music library
  32. You spend $60.00 for snacks for a two-day choir trip
  33. You decide against the hair coloring because you have a concert in a month
  34. Improper enunciation bothers you … a lot
  35. You use this as a to do list for your high school choir career
  36. You can sleep COMFORTABLY on a tour bus
  37. You dream in Latin
  38. You skipped first year Latin
  39. Your friends know all the songs, and they aren’t in choir
  40. You know which of your directors keys go to which door
  41. You can do your own makeup at 65 MPH on a windy road on a tour bus without a mirror
  42. You have gotten ready for a school dance on the way back from a choir trip
  43. You can hold hands with someone of the opposite gender and have it mean absolutely nothing
  44. You can hold hands with someone of the SAME gender and have it mean absolutely nothing
  45. You know that CTR really means “Choir Tour Romance”
  46. You drop into the choir room during the summer, because you miss it
  47. You have perfect concert attendance, and you graduated two years ago
  48. You think this list is funny
  49. You do chord analysis on the hymns during church (Oh wait, this isn’t the AP Music Theory Geek list?)
  50. All of your Senior memoirs are choir related
  51. You are jealous because there isn’t a summer choir camp
  52. Your choir uniform gets laundered weekly
  53. You dread people having birthdays in Spanish class because everyone sings off-key
  54. You really don’t mind the choir robes, they make you feel like you can fly
  55. You look forward to getting your license so you won’t be late to rehearsal
  56. You can quote “The Princess Bride” at the drop of a hat
  57. You were all-state at bus-surfing
  58. You idolize college choir directors
  59. You constantly worry about your hydration level
  60. You show up a half-hour early to your 5 AM departure to get the best bus seats
  61. You worry about what photos of you will surface at the end of year slide show
  62. You have worn your choir uniform to a formal dance
  63. The key of F Major makes you nauseous
  64. Only choir students show up to your birthday party
  65. You’ve sung tenor … and you are a girl
  66. You’ve sung alto … and you are a boy
  67. You remind your director that their wedding anniversary is this week
  68. People from other schools think you are related to your director
  69. You begin jumping up and down when sheet music gets delivered
  70. You use choir songs as lullabies while babysitting
  71. You have been overly critical of National Anthem performances at other schools
  72. You have auditorium envy
  73. You spend more time in the choir room then you do at home
  74. You accidentally call your director “Dad”
  75. The first homework that gets done is music memorization
  76. You have ever begun a sentence with “Yes, but if the basses would only use the proper resonance …”
  77. The phrase “If I could only get more guys …” has to nothing do with dating and everything to do with recruiting
  78. You know every hairstyle that keeps your bangs out of your face
  79. You finish your director’s quotes
  80. You think about how to balance your caffeine and water intakes
  81. To you, Gum is a four-letter word
  82. You wore your uniform for your Senior pictures
  83. You have OD’d on fast food on a choir trip
  84. You’ve developed muscles you didn’t know you had from moving the piano
  85. You develop crushes on people for their musical ability, not their looks
  86. You like the choir robes because they enhance your Harry Potter impression
  87. You think a piano reduction of a cappella music is redundant
  88. You know that SATB doesn’t mean “Sing Around the Bonfire”
  89. You have missed school more for choir than for illness
  90. You want to be in Treble Choir … and you are a guy
  91. You want to be in Men’s Choir … and you are a girl
  92. You compare bathroom acoustics
  93. You only pick jewelry that matches your choir uniform
  94. You give pitch to sing “Happy Birthday”
  95. You can tell what song it is by the given pitch
  96. You are STILL reading this list
  97. You know what flavor of latte your director likes
  98. You do your sectional Christmas shopping at Wal Mart
  99. You buy gifts for your section at Christmas
  100. You have outfit accessories with musical notation
  101. You think the choir polos are cool
  102. You think conductors batons are unnecessary
  103. You have no IDEA where your music is
  104. You sing in French better then you speak in English
  105. You have all the songs memorized … and you’re not in that choir
  106. You think Eric Whitacre is hotter then Brad Pitt
  107. You sing every part during the Hymns in church
  108. You wish that once, just ONCE, the Sopranos would have to sing harmony
  109. You sing the descant … and you are a guy
  110. You know the precise pitch of your alarm clock … its D#, quarter step flat
  111. You sit in the directors office to dream up more items for this list
  112. You know which fruit juice to drink before a concert
  113. You find yourself wishing the tenors would sing with stronger head voice
  114. You know chromatic solfege, and the correct hand signs
  115. You get antsy when you haven’t started on Christmas Music by October 5 th
  116. You have accused someone of singing with too much vibrato
  117. You have last years CD memorized … and you are a freshmen
  118. You want a conductor’s baton to go with your robe, because then you can REALLY enhance your Harry Potter impression
  119. You keep a graph of your high notes that includes time, altitude and humidity
  120. You keep a graph of your low notes that includes time, altitude and humidity
  121. The Marching Band either annoys you, scares you, or gives you new ideas to try
  122. You go through “Messiah Withdrawals” every January
  123. You grade other schools choir uniforms
  124. You pick your shoes by which ones will be most comfortable on a riser
  125. You enjoy pressing freshly copied music to your face to feel the warmth
  126. You have ever wished you had perfect pitch, just to make sight-reading easier
  127. You sing in the shower, and you aren’t taking a shower
  128. You try to match a choir piece to the ticking of a clock
  129. You stalk the jazz pianist from CBC
  130. You know where to stand on the risers and not make them squeak
  131. You use choir lyrics as pick-up lines
  132. You can sight read music faster than you can read your English homework
  133. You use old choir trophies as hall passes
  134. You aspire to be a bigger choir nerd than your director
  135. You and your friends debate the merits and flaws of other High School Choir programs
  136. You bond more with the tour bus drivers than with your parents
  137. You have slept in the upper bus luggage compartments
  138. When you’d rather sing the National Anthem at a Varsity game then be on the team that is playing
  139. You have a nick-name that only other choir members know or understand
  140. You can change on a bus with 44 other choir members, and not reveal a thing
  141. You own your own pitch pipe (double points if your pitch pipe is an A 440 tuning fork, triple points if you have a holster)
  142. You consider team suitcase packing an art form
  143. You plan your pre-concert meal (double points if it includes apple juice)
  144. You aspire to be a better scatter
  145. You have told the person next to you on the bus you are only “Using them as a pillow, nothing more!”
  146. You don’t consider the high point of festival attendance to be the opportunity to meet new members of the opposite gender
  147. You eagerly volunteer to turn pages for the pianist
  148. You only have Choir CD’s in your car
  149. When to you, the social event of the year is the CD Release Party
  150. You do impromptu performances of choir literature minus complete part representation
  151. You make fun of band geeks for their hectic fall season
  152. You get made fun of by band geeks for your hectic spring season
  153. You consider yourself both a choir nerd and a band geek, and you really don’t care
  154. You change out of your athletic uniform, cheer outfit or dance team uniform to sing the national anthem in your choir uniform
  155. You have mentioned to your friends that you are concerned about your vocal health
  156. You make the honor role because of your three A’s in choir
  157. You have used a pitch pipe as a harmonica
  158. You get angry when the class wants to watch video announcements at the beginning of 2 nd period rehearsal.
  159. You learn the solo, just in case the soloist needs back-up
  160. You load up on summer school and correspondence courses, just so you can take more choir classes
  161. You possess multiple copies of the same piece
  162. You don’t use your iPod for rock-and-roll
  163. You use a song from this years CD as a ring tone for your cell phone
  164. You brag about the size of your choir fine
  165. You wish your Sr. Aunt wasn’t your Sr. Aunt so you could try to ask her out
  166. You judge other choirs at festival harder then the judges do
  167. You compose songs, using your directors sayings as the lyrics
  168. You know your section better then your family
  169. You’ve been called a music snob, and you took it as a complement
  170. You know choir members as voice parts instead of names
  171. You didn’t join choir to get dates
  172. You are critical about Celine Dion’s vocal technique
  173. You tell the director that the music he just passed out was performed by (insert choir name) at/on (insert specific festival and year/CD recording)
  174. You make up new harmonies to Disney Theme Songs
  175. You get anxious about which picture will go in the senior frame
  176. You live vicariously through choir gossip
  177. You find it difficult to get past the first seven letters of the alphabet
  178. You supplement your workout with wind-sprints to the bathroom due to the three gallons of water you drink every day
  179. You look forward to the next opportunity to deface Kirby Shaw’s picture
  180. You have used your lawnmower to get pitch
  181. You consider Bagels and donut holes at a rest stop at 7:30 AM fine cuisine
  182. You purchase a cop uniform at a dollar store and try to arrest your director
  183. You have fallen asleep on the risers … during rehearsal
  184. Your screen saver is the choir calendar
  185. You have come back from a choir trip dating a different person than when you left
  186. YOU ARE STILL READING THIS LIST
  187. You really want to WD-40 the squeaky risers, but you are scared of the piles of chewed gum lurking underneath
  188. You just checked under the riser for gum
  189. You consider the Music Library Rodents as your pets
  190. You have a continuous, heated debate with your friends about which tastes better: Aquafina or Dasani
  191. You’ve been busted by your non-choir friends rocking out in your car to classical music
  192. You wish you could take more choir classes during the day
  193. You have an unspoken competition with your friends as to who is the bigger choir nerd
  194. You debate the vocal merits of chamomile versus green tea
  195. You get the feeling that your choir director knows more about your love life then you do
  196. You consider band humor to be gauche and unfunny
  197. You have the Eric Whitacre website linked to your homepage
  198. You can’t go to sleep until you have listened to “Sleep”
  199. Your last birthday/Christmas gift was purchased at the choir auction
  200. You spend the rest of the day trying to add to this list